I Protest

I feel that I have become too much of a conformist and stopped rebelling, am feeling quite nostalgic about my younger, angrier self. To reassure myself that my senses have not been totally dulled by age, have decided to e-protest against things that irritate me – some mundane, some silly, some important.

This just goes to show how old I am – instead of fighting with people, I am compiling lists of things I would like to fight about. Sigh !

• I protest against people who insist that conforming to other people’s norms is the way to live
• I protest against TV channels that sensationalise news and blow stories out of proportion. I especially protest against the crassness of a ticker on a news channel that while describing an incident of alleged marital rape said something like ‘uske pati ne mitron ke saamne usko parosaa’. ‘parosaa’ !!! ‘Rape’ or ‘baladhkaar’ would have sounded far better – in this case, the euphemism sounded much more disgusting than the actual word
• I protest against the low salaries paid to police officers and the defence force. If these people are to save my life (and yours), I want them to be paid better
• I protest against calories, think they should be declared illegal and exterminated. Forever and ever
• I protest against those who submit false rent receipts (or any false receipts) to save tax. I hate paying 30% tax too, but cheating on it brings one down to the level of the politician / bureaucrat who makes money on the sly
• I protest against those who think that everything Indian is bad and everything Amreekan is good
• I protest against those who think that being thin gives them a right to tell fat people what to eat. It’s my life, I will eat what I want, it is nobody’s business but mine
• I protest against people who are anal about ways of writing stuff or ways of doing things. If you want it written / done exactly ‘that’ way, then roll up your sleeves and get to it yourself
• I protest against those who are casual about details and accuracy, and think form is more important than content
• I protest against farters, hypocrites, arrogant people and unkind people
• I protest against those who think they know everything and want to pass on their gyaan to me
• I protest against ungrateful wretches
• I protest against the continued Chinese invasion of Tibet
• I protest against scientists and technologists who can put a man on the moon but can’t make a male uterus (so that men can have babies)
• I protest against the Olympics being held in Beijing – don’t think there has been much reform in China in any domain but economic
• I protest against Abhishek marrying Aishwarya
• I protest against the movie ‘Bheja Fry’ – think it was unkind to make fun of stupid people in that manner
• I protest against townies who make fun of Bandra
• I protest against those who recognised themselves in one of these points and won’t do anything to change the way they are
• I protest against high-heeled shoes and make-up
• I protest against those who are proud of their lack of knowledge of Indian history
• I protest against those who think that not singing ‘Jana Gana Mana’ is cool; also against those who make no effort to remember the lyrics
• I protest against people who point out that ‘protest’ is a verb and ‘I protest against’ is grammatically incorrect
  
  Aah ! I feel so much better now. Think I should do this more often.
  
  List compiled by,
  Zenobia.
  
  p.s. Anyone who wants to add stuff to the list, please feel free to add a comment. If there are enough additions, will post a second list.