The Times they are a-changing – but not fast enough

Part of the title of this post is explained by the two real-life episodes described below:

First there’s R bai, a feisty lady that works as a maid in Mumbai. This lady’s daughter is getting married soon; to a man she fell in love with. R bai says that she doesn’t really care which rituals are conducted during the marriage ceremony, she doesn’t even care whether the couple undergoes the saat pheras or not, what she is insisting on is that the marriage be registered in court. She feels that rituals do not put any pressure on the guy to actually take care of her precious daughter; and that the lack of a document that can stand up in court implies that they have no recourse to legal action if he ever deserts her or ill-treats her. Three cheers for R bai for thinking of legal action against an errant son-in-law and not echoing the ‘beti shaadi ke baad paraayi hoti hai’ sentiment!

Another heartening story is one of a kabaadiwaala in Delhi, let’s call him K. For some time, when illiterate K goes house-to-house buying old newspapers and magazines for reselling, he has been requesting housewives on his paper-route to point out to him articles about travel and give those magazines to him free. Why ? Because his daughter was attending classes for some travel – and – tourism related training and needed material for her assignments and project submissions. Apparently, K had decided years ago that he would educate both his children, not just the son as many of his friends did; he was determined to ensure that his daughter would be able to stand on her own two feet and never be forced to stay trapped in an unhappy or abusive marriage due to being financially dependent on her husband.

Earlier this year, K’s ambitions were fulfilled, his daughter completed her course and got a government job.

Kudos to this kabaadiwaala for having the guts and the vision for seeing a different future for his daughter, and for having the determination to make it happen, it couldn’t have been an easy journey. And, of course, hats off to the young lady for the hard work she must have put in to get this far.

And just when I begin to exult in how much the status of women in this country has improved, I read stories like the one below in the newspaper :

Mumbai : A 28-year-old housewife has filed a case against her in-laws and neighbours for allegedly stripping and molesting her a fortnight ago. Byculla police said the incident happened on August 17. Senior Inspector Tukaram Godge said the complainant, a resident of Sankalp Siddhi chawl in Byculla, was reportedly beaten up by her mother-in-law for breaking a kitchen utensil. “The women in the neighbourhood allegedly tore her clothes and stripped her while men molested her.”

Desh Mera !

By,
Zen